So today at work I went on a rampage of venting, now as some of you may be aware, this is an event where I can go on a largish monologue about whatever it is that has particularly edged my nerve.
For example, for those of you who read this blog, you saw a light version of my rant about Pirates of the Caribbean 3. Now this movie only irritated me slightly as I thought they could have done a better job... which brings me to rantings about something that does more than irritate me... things that just get right under my nerve.
So at work today, I went into such rant, after being silent in general for almost the entire day (by my own choice... I think I should take a vow of silence... because of Neitche) but then at the end of the day, while doing overtime with some friends a topic comes up and I voice my opinions. Fueled by the by laughter of my two comrades I continued, and in some cases with me, nothing is sacred (see paragraph 5).
Now... what made me realise that I even DO this ranting thing was the fact that on of these said friends after laughing said "Man I love it when Jon vents", and it brought upon revelation about it. For one... it actually showed me that I go into these vents, but I realised that it's usually in these rants when I almost discover more about my actual opinions on things than I do with just simple reflection. (However even reflection for me consists of a small venting of thoughts in my head... so I guess it's how I figure things out) I Don't think i'm a big fan of opening up... unless it's an provoked explosion.
But what caught me was the fact that when I get into these rants, how easily I can find myself tearing apart at people, not for reasons that aren't "supportable", but tearing is still tearing. It caught me, what if deep down I haven't really gotten rid of that malicious jerk that I was very frequently before leaving for Aus. I guess it's something that will still be there when you find it (too) easy to come up with sharp comments off the top of your head... but it's something that you have to be able to catch yourself doing. Even for humours sake? There are limits.
Am I a jerk? A thought.
That was one of today's many revelations. I rant. Who knew.
1 comment:
you're such a goof, Jonarkle. And far from a jerk, regardless of rants and the cutting comments you may make while you're ranting. Everyone has their moments. It doesn't make you a jerk.
P.S I love that you posted on xanga because now I can be lazy and just click that link to get to this blog. muah hhahahaha.
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