"Everyone's thinking that these days"

It's frustrating to me that I can't seem to get through a day without getting incredibly stressed out about my future...
Where am I going... what am I doing with my life... What are my plans? What should my plans be?

I'm left with this really empty feeling consistently in my gut that I'm falling behind where I "should be" in life... but I don't know where that "should be" is... or how to get there...

what a dowwwnnneerrrrrr



At least the weather has been nice.

Remembrance Day

Lest we forget.

Laid the wreath today on behalf of Gorman Bros. at the Remembrance day ceremony, which was pretty cool. I was really moved that I was asked to do it by my Grandpa, when he could have easily asked someone who was higher up in the company, more specifically his son, or HIS son who also has the last name Gorman. Instead I was asked... pretty awesome.

That being said, standing with the rest of the wreath layers put me with the likes of MLA's, Mayors, and other "big names" so far as Westbank goes... Although I definitely am not of any significance in the community haha, it was cool to feel like I was rubbing shoulders with them.

Lots of formal shaking of the hands between these bigwigs, that's what I noticed. Must perfect handshake.

-
On another topic? This is for all you Harry Potter fans. The best work he's done.

Two posts One day!

I just noticed that people have been commenting on old posts, and I haven't figured out how to have e-mail notifications on comments...
Anyways, "Anonymous" asked me a question regarding an post from a few weeks ago regarding "humility", and I gave a rather long winded answer which could almost act like a blog post in itself...
It can be read here, should anyone be interested/looking for a blog post that waxes philosophic versus talking about dead animals...

Roadcoon

Laura: When I die, I want to have a funeral that was like the one in "Darjeeling Limited"
Jon: I haven't seen it, whats the funeral like?
Laura: Oh, everyone wears white and they set the body out to sea and burn it
Jon: So you want everyone to wear white? Or you want your body set out in a boat
Laura: Everyone wearing white.. well I guess both
Jon: We don't really have a sea... we have the lake? It that okay? Set you off from the bridge?
Laura: I think that would freak a lot of people out...
Jon: Yea... but we wouldn't be able to get you to the ocean... oh wait! There isn't a toll booth anymore! Oh never mind, I'll totally get your body to the sea!

What else are friends for. Always there for you (unless a toll is involved)

Also... on the morbid topic of death... I think Raccoons are the most tragic roadkill animal. Partly because when you see them lying there you forget how absolutely freaky they are when they are alive, weird little hunch, hissing away with it's creepy paws... messed up. Forget that they look like "bandits"... they don't really though do they, maybe if they looked like they were wearing a balaclava... but no bandit wears the "Robin" syle mask. (In case it wasn't assumed, I saw roadkill raccoon today... roadcoon?)
That being said, if they were the little "thief" animals, then should we be praising cars for taking them out? I guess not, that would be encouraging vigilantism. Leave crime fighting to the police.
You win this time raccoons.

(Well... that one didn't.)

SONG!

160

Post 160!

It's Halloween, and I woke up this morning with "Don't fear the Reaper" stuck in my head. Appropriate, I thought.

New layout to the blog too, pretty cool I think. Freshened it up, motivated me to keep it up a bit more. I like how I could use my own pictures for the background too, it was taken
<-- Here. This blog was boring, read the one below, much more entertaining. For that matter... read ALL the ones below, I've got at least 159 of them

Also, Sir Elton John!

Texts

Tony: You can't get your heart broke if you fall in love every 20 minutes...
Jon: Haha, broken hearts are overrated... romanticized by musicians and poets :(
Tony: The assholes... like I needed another reason to drink
Jon: We'll get back at them... someday, somehow
Tony: Write our own songs. Ballads of Brotherhood, poems of passionate victory
Jon: Limericks of Life!
Tony: Sonnets of strength!
Jon: Haikus of heraldry!
Tony: Verdent Frendship in Free Verse!
Jon: Iambic Pentameters of idyllic persons!
Tony: Odes to originality!
Jon: Quatrains of courage!
Tony: Epics of excitement!
Jon: Couplets of charisma!
Tony:I'm all out. Good show
Jon: Phew, that was the last of my artillary.. haha I didn't know what I would follow the next one with. You began though, so we'll call it a draw
Tony: War is tough... almost like a chorus of companionship
Jon: Haha bravo. That was sneaky... like stanza.


Tony: I swear this class just wants to kill me. It's sentient an' vicious
Jon: Those are the worst... those and gnomes
Tony: Ugh. Your telling me. Dylan is actually playing one in our current campaign. Un-fucking-believable
Jon: hahah fantastic placement of an explicative
Tony: Thank you, I can do but try... Gnomes have that effect on me
Jon: It's butterflies for me... they think they are so great..
Tony: Don't worry. Bottom of the food chain an' incredibly short life span. They're made to look pretty pretty for us on warm spring days. Then they die.
Jon: You say the most beautiful things
Tony: I have my suspicion we have the same purpose for trees. That's why I support clear cutting.

SONG! (Sort of...?)

Archived "Rapture"

I felt the inspiration tonight to redirect you to an old post from earlier in the year.

That was good.

Today was one of those days.
Let me specify...

One of those amazing days. Nothing in particular happened, there was no great revelation, no big event, no long anticipated result, just... good.

The sun was out, work was satisfying, lunch was smaller than usual, (but that was my own fault), air was crisp, didn't get much studying done (disappointing), forgot my lock at work so I needed to go back and grab it (Inconvenient), had coffee, saw friends, went to church, also watched the end of "Sherlock" this morning (no specific order in this list, my bad)

It was a day in the life, it was just.... good. As I drove home in the dark from the University/Church I just... got high haha. A complete and utter happiness, fantastic. Perhaps it was the new Joshua Radin CD that inspired me and put me in this place, maybe it was good friends, good church, good God! But I'm just happy, and wanted to express that in textish form.

It's a hard to explain feeling, but it was a genuine acknowledgment that I wouldn't change anything about how life is going right now, at this very moment. With all the stress, all the school, all the friends, all the work. I've even started playing guitar daily, which centers me even more. I want to laugh. I am laughing.

Life is just.... good. And I don't mean that "things are going well for me at the moment", I mean life is good. It's good being alive. I am happy I am alive.

"You're not dead, and in my books? That's a damn good reason to be happy". I am. Both.

I could delve into a deeper, philosophical post, theological even, but no. I just wanted to proclaim how great it is to be alive, and to be able to experience the beauty that is this world, this life and all the people in it. That means you! (Which in the most likely case for you reader(s?), I can also throw in a heartfelt "I miss you" and I would love to laugh over a pint, someday).

As I mentioned, new Josh Radin, I can't figure out my favorite song, so here are 3!

The Ones With the Light

You're not as Young as you Once were

Finally, "Road to Ride on"


Which one should be my favorite? haha.



(I miss my long hair too I've just realized)

Something in the Water

The last post was long, and there weren't any pictures of music. For this, I apologize, and hope that this peace offering will earn some forgiveness.

--> A Great song

And a picture I took a few years ago (look at that, archived oldie)




Interestingly, the picture is in colour. Cool.

As I hope to show

This blog post is against my better judgment in light of week 1 of the "Midterm wave", however the risk of becoming the "worst blog poster ever" as Mike so elegantly puts it, motivates me to at least pour something fresh in here.

But what...

This past week was fantastic, quite eventful and at the moment the highlight of this fall. Specifically it was a trip down to Vancouver to see As I Lay Dying/Unearth with Mike, followed by a sitting in the LSAT exam a day later... too much driving. School is school, as mentioned earlier midterms are on the immediate horizon, but I can make up for this lost time tomorrow (what else are birthdays for than hard work?). Thanksgiving yesterday, twas good. Also, Nicole moved out today, so that's noteworthy as well, living in Fernie for the next few months at least.

So that's that on the "current events" side of things... Unfortunately, as eventful as my life truly is, I'm not very good at frequent updates in this chronicling effort... Twitter is over on the side there... I can update that with my phone, so it gets a bit more attention. (However, that's definitely not a chronicle of my life... or at least I hope not).
Wouldn't it be something to become accomplished enough to have a biography written after you? Autobiographies don't seem to have the same flair... more accurate yes, but someone else wasn't so intrigued by your life that they felt the need to put it on paper. Meh... My life is somewhat written in a series of 1's and 0's that if Blogger ceases to be will be lost forever.

On another note, as I mentioned, I went to As I Lay Dying the other day, and it was fantastic. I love the fact that I can have these musicians to admire not only for their music, but on another note for their personal convictions and message. Listening to some of their convicting lyrics is a fresh dose of "examine your own life" that I know I so desperately need... My biggest concern of late is that I keep forgetting to surrender my own sense of entitlement. Unfortunately it's too easy to get caught up in the day to day, comings and goings of a busy life, so much so that my own schedule, my own immediate desires come to the forefront too often. I act and speak before listening too often... This I recognize, and too often excuse with the idea that my own little kingdom that is "life" should be run this way. Thankfully, this recent kick of AILD's lyrics have been the little kick that I needed to remind me of efforts to humble myself.

Humility, that's the word I need to remember. I once (not recently unfortunately) had someone say that I was "too humble", which I took as being the greatest compliment. There is a C.S. Lewis quote I read the other day that went something along the lines of "Love is unselfishly choosing for another persons good", which to me is humility in action. The effort to put aside ones own sense of entitlement, perhaps in my case an overinflated sense of self-worth, and instead focus on this love. Servitude to the interests of those around me, those affected by my life both directly and indirectly. Too often am I focused on the serving myself, and then on a more faith based perspective, is that exemplifying the teachings of Christ? An exemplification that should be on the forefront of my day to day actions. It's an effort to set myself apart from the world that we live in... be against the grain from so many things that I know I should be. I would hope that humility towards my own convictions will keep me on the path I want to tread, without any compromise that I justify by this sense of ownership and entitlement to my own comfort and desires.
Sometimes this train of thought leads me to let myself be taken to an extreme where I entertain ideas of dropping it all to go care for those in need, inspired by those who laid it all down to care for orphans, for widows. I wonder if these ideas are fueled by a sense of "capitalist guilt", or whether the guilt that I feel for not fulfilling them is fueled by something more...
Perhaps guilt isn't the right response at all... appropriately I should be motivated, acting on ideas in an attempt to inspire others. Nevertheless, I feel like I need to do more.
Serve more.
Love more.


I am a walking contradiction that's found consistency
Consuming everything, all without producing sustenance.

In the parallels we struggle to upkeep, there is a better way for us to be set free.
From all it is we crave, there must be more to life than to simply stay alive

We are not the same as I hope to show. There is a better way if we just let go

Apple Triathlon 2010

Well! There it was, "The Event" of the summer for me.

Two years ago I did my first "triathlon" event... on a relay with my Dad and Cousin, where I did the swim portion. I got infected with the Triathlon bug, and wanted to do them ever since.

I trained for the three sports, and did a local Sprint Tri event in Peachland, but in my mind it was all leading up to what is (in my opinion) the biggest sporting event in Kelowna. The Apple Triathlon (also known as the Canadian National Championships haha).

Anyways, last summer rolled around, and I was infected with a different type of bug... Although the Triathlon bug was there, I also became violently ill. I don't remember the last time I had been that sick... in the week before the race I couldn't hold down anything I had eaten, I was bedridden in a cold sweat, and weaker than I had ever felt.

Despite my best attempts to lie to myself... (up until 30 min before my wave start), I finally had to admit defeat and hand in my timing chip. I tried to do a warm up, but after 50m I realized I was in no place to race... I guess a week of debilitating sickness will do that to you...

Regardless!! Although I recovered from the physical ailment, the Tri bug was still in me, and more determined than ever, I prepared myself for the next year. (The fact that I became the unofficial poster boy of the triathlon helped keep me motivated... how embarrassing that I was/am on the front page of the website, yet had never done the full triathlon...) (http://www.appletriathlon.com/)


All summer was leading up to this event for me, there was even a point where I hurt my legs a week before opening of Joseph, and (although maybe not the most appropriate response, seeing as it was a week before opening) I was primarily concerned with "will I be okay for the Triathlon?".

Then last Sunday came round




Final time 2:25:52
16th overall in my Age Category (M 20-25), even had my name listed in the paper in the top times for local competitors!
Also, noticing the times of other competitors in different categories, my time was only 3 min behind the fastest female in the 20-25 age group... who had come from Toronto for the triathlon, so pretty much as "serious" as some of the Triathletes get. So I was pretty pumped, with a bit more focused training, next year will be even better!

NEXT YEAR!

(In keeping tradition, I really like this song lately)

Feeling the Revival!

Greg Sczebel "Causin' A Commotion"

Bet you know someone in this music video!




Tell YOUR friends, (I just told mine).

New toy

I finally joined the cult yesterday.




I don't know if there's an app for that...

Those summer nights

Yikes.... that last post had no proof reading, and I REALIZED that I have a bad habit of spelling realized with an "s". How embarrassing.

Watched a thunderstorm tonight, which is exciting. Although, (obviously), I'm hoping that no fires start... a little bit of me is missing the rush that last summer provided. I'm already a bit of an adrenaline junkie to a certain extent, so fighting fires and having an entire town evacuated watching as multiple fires burn? Exciting.

But, as I said earlier... here's hoping for the best.


Also, sitting with friends, watching the lightning approach, brought me back to some of my most cherished memories of sitting by train tracks in the early hours of the morning watching the light from the oncoming trains light up the dark. I love (oh) these summer nights (Tell me more)


Found an awesome new band! "The Black Pacific". New project by the old frontman of Pennywise. Awesome album, although it's not released until Sept. Thing is... I was able to download it in it's entirety on iTunes... weird, and surely some sort of glitch? Whatever it was, I got the new album a month early, and it's swell.

Here's a song from it

Daedalus

Somehow, somewhere when I was younger I became familiar with fables and legends. I am writing about those timeless tales such as Greek mythology, or morality tales which have withstood the ages. However, I realise now how little these stories make it into our modern consciousness... I can only assume that I became familiar with these stories due to cartoons introducing them to me, but I'm not reminded of them anymore. Perhaps I should start watching cartoons again...

Well, that being said, I was listening to one of my favorite CD's the other day, and was started thinking about one of my favorite old stories, the Greek legend of Icarus and Daedalus (where Icarus flies too close to the sun). Then, when listening to a particular song on the CD that tells the story through the perspective of Daedalus, I realize it is, yet again, a tragedy that I am drawn to.

But there is something to these "sad endings" persisting through time... I'll use that as my excuse to save people from thinking that I am a particularly dark person haha. But there is something beautiful in the tragedy of this story.

or maybe I just like the song

Life is good

So...

As a post to keep this blog relatively fresh... I will just rave about life.

Yes, rave, not rant. Things are just... so good right now. So good. Awesome times, with even better friends. Summer now, so the weather is amazing, and despite the one inconvenience of summer courses (semesters of which I am in between at the moment) things are going well.

Haven't been out Waterskiing yet this year... one downside. BUT, I have been getting a bunch of training time for Triathlons lately, which has been awesome. Figured I'd make the best out of a slow work schedule, and it's been great!

The weekly "movie night" turned into "Firefly night" and thus gained more followers, but that season will come to an end soon, and we will have to expand to new horizons for our media distractions. Also, "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour dreamcoat" is going really well, and is already over 3,000 tickets sold. Pretty cool indeed.

ONE, only ONE thing that I still wish could happen this summer... but here's hoping that everything from prayer, to schemes will come through? haha.... oh boy. No more elaboration, as I'm worried of jinxing. But oh boy to I constantly wish for it to occur...

But, I am more than content, I am happy. Genuinely, and utterly happy.

I will try to update the blog more often with fun more "current event" type posts, but at the moment I can't think of any, and figured I would just write cheerful things.

THIS IS THIS WEEKS SONG!!!!

(I tried uploading a picture, but no luck... tradition failed)

Shrapnel

As you, the reader, potential reader, past reader, skimmer, stalker, etc might know, I have two jobs. Now, each of these jobs has their respective risks... lifeguarding isn't so much a risk towards myself but more the risk of other people dying... and Gorman's has the risk of being mauled by a machine if not locked out properly.

However, the most terrifying risk from both of them are the head-shots.

Let me explain, at Johnson Bentley, when leaving deck, the lifeguards do general cleaning around the changerooms as they leave deck, this usually involves mopping with a mop and bucket that has never been changed when you start the shift. That means that the mop water is filled with hair, dirt, for some reason grey foam, and all sorts of reminders that the public, in general, is disgusting. (yayyyy)

Gormans, particularily on my Graveyard shift, makes use of the "air hose" quite a bit, which is a high pressure... well... air hose. Now, this pressured air, when aimed at a location that has no "exit route" will shoot right back at you, carrying with it all the sawdust, dirt, hydraulic oil and grease with it in a typhoon of lame.

Although not the worst risks in some eyes, these are the things I fear the most when arriving at either job, primarily because of my bad luck with them. I am always getting splashed with the mop swamp water, or blasting myself in the face with the air hose by accident when I don't notice a slight change in the angle of the machine.

This got me to thinking, with my kind of luck with this assortment of smelly, greasy concoctions... survey would indicate that my luck in a warzone would be zip to none. I think I would be taken out by shrapnel in a second... it seems to be fate that I get blasted in the face unwillingly by hydraulic-oil-covered-bark on a nightly basis, so I can I can only assume that this indicates my luck in regards to unwanted projectiles.

That was what I thought about last night. Approx 3:45 am, as I am welcomed by sawdust shrapnel across the front of my body.

Today's song.

...or not to ink

Yay



Powerless Rise came out today. Now I can listen to it in the car, on a boat, in the rain, on a train. It is my green eggs and ham without a doubt. (However the video is not from the new CD, it still makes me happy to see the band in action, they inspire me.)

On the note of this video, notice the amazing sleeves that Tim (lead singer) has.... so awesome. We were talking on graveyard the other day (Dan's last weekend too... sad) about tattoos, what folk would get, what ones are dumb, tattoo tradition and culture etc, etc. I love tattoo's personally... but not one-off ones, I love sleeves. I love tattoos that take up someones entire arm, plastered with colour/black and white. Even if it's the "lame" imitation tribal designs, which I don't like as much because they seem uninspired, they still look better than a bare arm.
So why don't you get a tattoo Jon?

Three reasons
1) My aspirations: I feel like, in light of the various things that I aspire towards in life, tattoos would act as a hindrance. For example, professionally; at the moment I aspire to be a lawyer. Obviously everything in life is subject to change, but should this follow through, that professional sphere might not look so kindly upon the type of tattoo that I would feel is worth getting (the aforementioned "sleeve" or even half sleeve). Even my hobbies, such as acting, or my part time jobs at the moment like life-guarding, having tattoos would be an issue. Actors on stage are constantly hiding and covering up their markings, and a lifeguard with a sleeve would just come across as unapproachable to seniors and children... sad but true.

2) The inevitable(?) regret: This is obviously going to be mentioned... for it's the most cliche reason why not to get inked. What if your interests change? Whatever, it's a reminder of the past, but still, what if the regret is based in....

3) Baddd art: This is a huge one for me. Some tattoos just look awful. It's not the design necessarily, but rather the execution. Faces, scenery, even straight lines sometimes seem impossible for some of these artists. I am a critic at heart, and easily unimpressed. To be permanently stained with some random person's poorly executed artwork would be my own personal circle of hell on earth. Maybe I'm being over dramatic, but I would hate it.

Maybe I could get a Chinese symbol? That means.... serenity? Hmm.... lame, (and secretly nerdy, but no one has to know that)

Still.... So freaking cool... If anything ever were to happen to me where my aspirations listed above were to become an impossibility? I am colouring myself in.





Other than that, I have been successfully filling up my days, and just today encountered my first "scheduling conflict" of my new "summer activities".

Awesome, things are back to normal.

The Powerless Rise

Edit: This is one of my favorite lyrics on the CD, thought I'd share

Simplicity is not a curse where strength is humbled
and the powerless rise.
This is a kingdom born upside-down.
This is a kingdom where the broken are crowned.

Just a taste of the most perfect metal CD I have ever heard.


Original post:

WOAHHHHHHH
AHHHHHHH
EEEEEE!

As I Lay Dying's new CD is streaming on their myspace now.... it comes out on tuesday. I was pumped enough due to the single's that they had released (as discussed in "Parallels" post) but now I've listened to the whole thing.

I think I've just found my favorite CD ever. Words cannot describe how excited I am about this music. Perfect doesn't even do it justice. Maybe it does. But none the less. Convicting lyrics, amazing guitar, and a performance from a band that I respect more and more every time I see anything about them.
Inspiring.

We are not the same, as I hope to show.

Anti-Stagnancy

I don't feel like I have anything to say, but nothing is worse than a stagnant blog. It is a rare enough treat for someone to even read a blog these days, so when someone checks for the second time, maybe even third, and there isn't anything different? The reader almost feels bitter towards the blog for wasting their time;

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT PARALLELS YOU STUPID BLOG!" They screamed*
*(I assume)

Moving on.

So, Summer is here, and my schedule has lightened up not only immensely, but almost completely. Particularly in the first week after finals and Sweeney ended... I had no idea what to do with my time. It's a weird transition going from days being on a time limit (okay, I have 30 min to get from here to here before I have to begin this), to all of a sudden saying "I have nothing planned today...) Granted, I've been able to find ways to fill my days since, but it began as a strange experience.
That being said... despite finding little things to fill my days, I wish I had some "big plans" for the season. I keep getting asked (albeit small talk, I do recognize that) "any big plans for the summer?".
Now, the fact that I answer "no" to everyone that asks me that question makes me feel like I should have some sort of big plan. I do plan to see The Lion King in Vancouver in July, but that's hardly "big" plan. Joseph I guess.... but even so.

So, this is an open letter to anyone who might read this blog, I want to have a better answer for the "big plans" question.





And a song